FREE – Monthly Short Story from ‘The Wight Fair Writers Circle!’ www.iowwritingcircle.co.uk

The Wight Fair Writers Monthly Short Story!

‘The Adoption’

By Trudy Draper

Trudy also writes Trudy’s Talk Back see www.iowwritingcircle.co.uk

 

 

We married young and didn’t want children for a long time.  Life seems endless when

you are only 18 – careers first, children later.  We had a plan, a sensible plan.  Young

people usually have an idea of what they want from life; unfortunately life doesn’t always

follow the same path.  That’s what happened to us.  Life made its own plan for us.

 

My career came to an abrupt end with redundancy raised its head.  Not in the life plan at

all; never mind we could alter our plan and have children now instead of later.  Getting

pregnant proved not as easy as you would think.  It took several years for me to get

pregnant; why so long?  I didn’t know; I became pregnant eventually so life on track at

last.  Just ten days later, ten unbelievably joyful, ecstatic, hopeful days later it was

all over.

Baby was no more; all lost in a moment.  Not in our plan at all.  In the shortest time

possible all our dreams were shattered and all our hopes gone.

After the miscarriage the doctor said: ‘no children for you.  Try adoption.’

What was he saying?  This made no sense and it was certainly not in the plan either.

Everyone and anyone could have a baby; babies arrived when they were not wanted;

whey they could not be cared for and were neglected.  Our baby was wanted and would

be loved so where was he?   We had to have a rethink.  Could we love a child not born to

us; would we feel the same about a baby not linked to us by blood?  Major questions

meant lots of talking.  We decided adoption would be fine so decision made, let’s go and

get a baby.

 

Adoption 2

 

This route to parenthood proved to be very slow indeed.  Talking, talking, always talking

– where was the baby we wanted?  Not in this office or at this meeting; why were we

kept waiting?

‘There are not many babies available,’ said the adoption worker.  ‘Would you consider

older children, a sibling group or a disabled baby?’

What was this?  No baby, after all the talking, no baby – our plan was in shreds.

We only wanted one tiny, tiny baby but none was in the picture or even on the distant

horizon.

‘We only place about 12 babies a year from our agency.  Everyone wants a blue eyed,

blond baby and they hardly ever exist,’ the social worker sounded sympathetic.

We were not put off even though the adoption agency was not very optimistic.  It had

taken two years of letter writing to even get an appointment.  We thought we were half

way to having our baby now we were inside the agency; now we are being told the

baby did not exist.  Why had we been put through this torture if we were chasing a

rainbow?

Everywhere I looked there were mothers and babies.  Mothers shouting at babies – did

they have to pass an exam to get one?  No, they were lucky and did not even know it.

We had passed the exam.  We had sailed through all the interviews, expected adoption

panel approval and a certificate to prove we would be good parents; we just didn’t have a

baby to practice on.

Adoption 3

 

I tried not to think of adoption and it problems every waking moment but it was hard.

Life went on and we had to cope with brothers and sisters having children; with friends

getting married and a baby straight away.  We had been married for over 10 years and

everyone assumed we did not want children. It was a difficult secret to share with anyone

else.  In fact our years together in a stable marriage were used against us by one social

worker who thought we were too set in our ways and a baby could disrupt us and put a

strain on our marriage.  We were only in our 20s!

We carried on meeting the adoption agency; we had to bare our souls; meeting after

meeting talking, talking about adoption and what it meant.  No one who was half hearted

about adoption would ever get to the final panel.  And I suppose that was the whole point.

The agency had to make sure we were really serious.  It was like having a two year

pregnancy with no guarantee of a baby or child at the end of it.

We talked about adoption of older children and we decided that the only thing we could

not cope with was a handicapped child.  Having a disabled child naturally was one thing,

but taking on a child knowing it might always be dependent; might never leave home;

could never achieve the usual milestones of childhood and adulthood; that was an entirely

different kettle of fish.  We knew we could not do it.  We said we were sorry if we

sounded inadequate; we had to be honest.  The agency said we had to be truthful and it

was not a failure.  They were very kind but we still felt like the Nazis wanting a pure

race and felt we had let down all the unknown disabled children looking for homes.

We went before the panel and were approved for adoption.  We had confirmation we

would be good parents and had the diploma – still no child.

 

Adoption 4

 

The agency as ever kept our feet on the ground and said we could have a two year wait

before we were offered a child.  The process had made me become a very patient person.

So we got on with life again.  We had many friends, lots of Godchildren, loads of

nephews and nieces and we were happy but something was always missing.

I thought I might be pregnant again but I had not done a test as we were told it was

impossible.  But today I couldn’t put it off any longer and I carried out the test;  it was

positive.  Happiness was tinged with one worry – would I lose this one as well?

Then, out of the blue a few days later, the phone rang and I picked it up not knowing my

life was about to change.  It was the adoption agency.

‘We have a baby boy; would you be interested?’ was the startling inquiry.

The agency had expected to place the boy somewhere else but the family lived near the

baby’s natural family and that was against their policy.  So we were being offered him.

I could not take in anything after her first inquiry. ‘We have a baby boy, would you be

interested’ and had to ask her to repeat the rest.

My nerves were tingling, my head was about to explode.  I shivered in anticipation and I

could not take it in.  Years of wanting and yearning all over in a second.

‘Yes, we are interested,’ was my inadequate reply.  I did not mention the pregnancy or I

might not be allowed to have this baby.  I could not risk ending up with no babies.  After

years of famine I now faced a glut of babies.  Two in a year.

‘You will never believe it but he is the healthy, blue eyed, blond boy we told you did not

exist.’

 

Adoption 5

 

I didn’t care what colour his eyes were; what was she talking about?

‘When can we meet him?’ that was all I wanted to know.

‘Come to the office on Wednesday.’  It was as simple as that.

We then realised why the adoption process is so intensive.  We were about to be given a

helpless bundle, a vulnerable child and the agency had to be sure we were the right

people in every way.

Wednesday seemed to be forever arriving.  I woke at 5am on Wednesday and was ready

hours early.

We walked into the office and were told that we could meet the baby but if we did not

want him then we must say so.  There was no pressure.  The baby was brought in.

He was placed in my arms.  I hugged him to me.  Ecstacy.

 

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